दिप्ती.कथन (Dipti.Kathan)

हा हा म्हणता २०१८ संपलंही. २०१८ चा आज शेवटचा दिवस. उद्यापासून २०१९ साल सुरू होणार.  या नवीन वर्षाच्या सर्वांना सर्वात आधी अनेक अनेक हार्दिक शुभेच्छा. येणारं हे साल आपणा सर्वांना सुख, समृद्धी, आनंद, सुयश, प्रेम, शारीरिक-मानसिक-बौद्धिक-भावनिक-अध्यात्मिक-आर्थिक संपन्नतेचं जावो, ही ईश्वरचरणी प्रार्थना.  आज अगदी सकाळपासूनच सोशल मीडियावर नवीनवर्षाभिनंदनाचे मेसेजेस फिरत आहेत. सर्वच जण २०१८ च्या गोड-कटू सर्वच आठवणींना उजाळा देत आहेत. माझ्याही मनात २०१८ चा फ्लॅशबॅक तरळून गेलाच. मी खूप काही पाहिलं, अनुभवलं आणि शिकले.  आपण प्रत्येकच जण आपापल्या आयुष्यात काहीनाकाहीतरी नेहमी शिकत असतो. मलाही या वर्षात बरंच काही शिकायला मिळालं. त्यातलेच काही अनुभव मला थोडक्यात मांडायचे आहेत.  खरं तर, प्रेम-देव-कर्म या सर्वांवरच माझा लहानपणापासून विश्वास आहेच. माझ्या घरच्यांनी, शिक्षकांनी, मित्र-मैत्रिणींनी आणि एकूणच माझ्या वातावरणाने मला जे काही घडवलं आहे त्यामुळे प्रेम-देव-कर्म या तिन्हींवर माझा आधीपासूनच दृढ विश्वास आहे. पण या वर्षात मला या तिन्ही शक्तीचं सामर्थ्य नव्याने अनुभवायला...

"हॅलो,  कसा आहेस?  खूप दिवस झाले,  तुझ्याशी  बोलणं नाही झालं माझं. म्हणून आज मुद्दाम पत्र लिहायला घेतलंय. तुझ्याशी  बोलण्याचा खूप दिवस माझा प्रयत्न चालू आहे पण तू व्यस्त आहेस,तुझ्या रोजच्या धावपळीत. आणि  तुझ्या दगदगीच्या आयुष्यात असं तुला डिस्टर्ब करणंही मला पटत नाही. खरं तर खूप बोलायचं आहे, सांगायचं आहे मला तुला. पण कसं सांगावं, काय सांगावं आणि किती सांगावं हेच उमजत नाहीये. बऱ्याच दिवसांनी एखाद्याशी बोलायला गेल्यावर कधीकधी आपले आपल्यालाच शब्द सापडत नाहीत, तसंच काहीसं माझं झालंय. तसा तू काही मला परका नाहीस...  पण... असो...  माझं ना, एक निरीक्षण आहे. तू ना आजकाल मला आधीसारखा - म्हणजे लहानपणी होतास ना - तसा आनंदात दिसत नाहीस रे. तुझ्या चेहऱ्यावर तू कसलंतरी अनामिक ओझं आणि त्रास घेऊन फिरत असतोस. तुझ्या चेहऱ्यावर निखळ आनंद मला दिसतंच नाही हल्ली. सतत कसली ना कसलीतरी भीती, नाहीतर त्रागा, शंका, तक्रारी आदींचा पेहराव असतो तुझ्या संपूर्ण व्यक्तिमत्त्वावर.  त्यादिवशी बाजूच्या रमाकांतच्या मुलाच्या परीक्...

Some days back, I had received a photo on What's app conveying a graphical message that God doesn't like it when people forward photos in name of him where they say," If you share this, you will get some good news within XYZ hours/days or "If you don't share this, some bad will happen." I found it so appealing that I had saved that photo in my gallery with an intention to send that to someone who forwards such kinds of messages.  How do you feel, when you get such kinds of messages in name of God? Definitely, you too don't like it,right? Hm, there is nothing to like that. And I am pretty sure that God himself doesn't like such kinds of posts.  Sometime I just wonder what the God must be thinking while seeing his devotees sending such posts.  But why do people forward such kinds of messages? I always have this question on my mind. After pondering over this, the Psychologist inside me gives me the answer (Most probable answer). And the an...

It has been proved that Bronze medalists are happier than Silver medalists in spite of the widespread belief that 'Silver medal' is better than 'Bronze medal'.  Why does this happen? Because of 'Upward Counterfactual thinking' where a person thinks of or expects the better/more desirable result/situation/outcome than what is actually there in the reality.  According to the substantial Psychological research, people have tendency to engage themselves in/adopt the Counterfactual thinking. 'Counterfactual thinking' is a style or a way of thinking where a person thinks of possible optional situation/result/outcome than what is there in front of him in reality. There are two types of Counterfactual thinking - Upward and Downward.  In Upward Counterfactual thinking, a person thinks of (relatively) a better/more desirable  outcome/situation/result than what is really there in his plate. E.g. Rohan, who started his studies just few days back of his exam...

मला अजूनही आठवतो तो दिवस, ज्या दिवशी मी माझी पहिली कविता केली होती. ती निसर्गावर होती. आणि तेव्हापासून माझा कागद आणि पेनासोबतचा प्रवास सुरू झाला तो आजतागायत चालू आहे आणि पुढेही राहील. सुरुवातीच्या  दिवसांमध्ये मी वही किंवा डायरीतच लिहायचे. अजूनही अधून मधून लिहिते - अधूनमधून. कारण -आजकाल बऱ्याचदा संगणकावरच लिहिणं होतं - सॉरी, टाईप करणं होतं. जेव्हा मी पहिल्यांदा संगणकावर टाईप करायला सुरुवात केली तेव्हा मला फार गोंधळून जायला व्हायचं. म्हणजे कीपॅडवर ए नंतर बी का नसतो, एस का असतो, असे बालसुलभ प्रश्न मला पडायचे. पण हळूहळू कीपॅडशी दोस्ती झाली आणि लेखन ते टायपिंगचा प्रवास सुरू झाला. पण तरीही कागदावर लिहायची गंमत काही औरच, नाही का? आज आपल्याला संगणकावर पटापट टाईप करता येतं. नको ते खाडाखोडीशिवाय पुसून टाकता येतं. सॉरी, डिलीट करता येतं. हवं तेव्हा त्यात सुधारणा करता येतात. असंच काहीसं पुस्तकांचंसुद्धा. आपण आपल्या लहानपणी पुस्तकं वाचायचो.  म्हणजे आजही वाचतो. पण आज पुस्तक वाचनापेक्षा ऑनलाईन पुस्तकं, लेख, कथा, कादंबऱ्या  वाचणं आणि लेखकाला समोरासमोर अभिप्राय देण्याऐवजी सोशल म...

Yes... You read it right... Be your best friend... But don't misinterpret by thinking that it's okay to not be with people or to avoid them. What I meant by the title is to be the best friend of yours, to be the best company of yours.   Today we see many people around who cling on others, who need company of others to be 'whole'. They just can't imagine their life without some people. Isn't it a kind of dependency? And most of us, we name this 'clinging' as 'love'. Isn't it?  Clinging resembles with attachment... And Love is surprisingly different than attachment. When we cling on others, we need them to fulfill our existence. In most of the relationships today, we see that people are attached with each other and may not be really loving each other.(Again let me clarify that I am writing all this as per my concept of Love. So you have whole right to disagree with this.) When we cling on others, I feel that we loose our individuality and get ...

'इच्छा तेथे मार्ग' असं आपण म्हणतो. खरंच आहे ते. पण कधीकधी इच्छांच्या आड कर्तव्यं येतात. कर्तव्यांचं पारडं जड होतं आणि इच्छांना मुरड घालावी लागते आणि परिणामी इच्छा अपूर्ण राहतात. भारतासारख्या देशातील  स्त्री - पुरुषांच्या बाबतीत आणि त्यातही स्त्रियांच्या बाबतीत हे फार प्रकर्षाने दिसून येतं कारण आपण सामुदायिक जीवनशैलीला महत्त्व देणार्या समाजात राहतो. त्यामुळे आपल्याकडील बर्याच जणांनी आपापल्या स्वप्नांचा आपल्या घरच्यांसाठी किंवा इतर नातेवाईकांसाठी किंवा अजून इतर कोणासाठी बळी दिल्याचं आपल्याला नक्कीच पाहायला मिळतं. स्त्रियांच्या बाबतीत तर हे अधिक प्रमाणात दिसून येत. भारतासारख्या देशांतील स्त्रियांच्या बाबतीत तर दोन दोन घटक त्यांच्या स्वप्नांची, इच्छा-आकांक्षांची गळचेपी करण्यात आपली भूमिका बजावताना दिसतात - सामुदायिक जीवनशैली आणि पुरुषप्रधान संस्कृती.  एकूण काय, जगाच्या पाठीवर बहुसंख्य लोकांच्या अनेक इच्छा-आकांक्षा अपूर्ण राहतात. त्यापैकी दोन महत्त्वाची कारणं वर उल्लेखलेली आहेत पण अजूनही काही कारणं आहेत. उदाहरणार्थ, काही काही जणांना लहानपणापासून सतत सहन करावी लागण...

 आपल्यापैकी प्रत्येलाला लहानपणी अशी विचारणा झालेली असते की तुला मोठेपणी काय किंवा कोण व्हायचंय. आणि आपल्यापैकी प्रत्येकानेही आपापल्या परीने या प्रश्नाच उत्तर दिलेलं असतं." मला डॉक्टर व्हायचंय","मला इंजिनीअर व्हायचंय"," मला शिक्षक व्हायचंय" या रूढीपरंपरेने चालत आलेल्या विधानांमध्ये कधीकधी "मला अभिनेता/अभिनेत्री व्हायचंय","मला पायलट व्हायचंय" अशीही विधानं चमकून जातात. डॉक्टर म्हणजे काय, इंजिनीअर म्हणजे काय किंवा इतरही अमुक अमुक म्हणजे काय हे पूर्णपणे माहीत नसतानाही एवढ्या लहान वयात आपल्याला असं कसं वाटतं की मला अमुक अमुक व्हायचंय? उत्तर तसं सोपं आहे. आपण हे सगळं निरीक्षणातून शिकतो. आपल्याला माहित असलेल्यांपैकी कोणीतरी डॉक्टर असतं, कोणीतरी इंजिनीअर असतं, कोणीतरी माधुरी किंवा दीपिकाचे डान्स परफॉर्मन्सेस पाहिलेले असतात. भलेही आपल्याला नेमकं कळत नसलं की ही माणसं काय करतात पण आपल्याला त्यांच्यामधील काहीतरी भावलेलं असतं. अर्थात आता आपल्याला काय भावतं किंवा भावावं हे आपल्या संस्कारांवर अवलंबून असतं. इथे मी 'संस्कार' हा शब्द आपल्या घराती...

We had met after a really long time. I was little sad due to certain things in my life. After seeing this,he shared his insights about his life. He has talked and mentally supported many people across the world who had been having some serious life issues. " I have seen so much pain and problems of people that I started feeling that the only goal of the life should be 'being happy'. I learned that its really important to be happy. Be happy anywhere, everywhere. It takes nothing to be happy. I will be happy anywhere. I will be happy when I will be rich and happy even if I am a beggar. I just want to be happy. Do what makes you happy. Decide what you want and focus on that. Nowadays a problem with people is that they are not focused. They want to do everything. They want to try many things at a time and that creates hurdles. So its better to focus on one thing and progress. Happiness is really important. Happiness is within us." His thoughts were eye opener. I relearne...

"I started wondering why only I am getting deeply involved in my relationships. I think I was so alone that only I needed people. But now I am feeling that its okay if you have less people in your life but the only need is that they should be genuine. We expect small small things from people and if they are not fulfilled, we get easily hurt. We should stop expecting but in this process we shouldn't they dry. As if we get dry, we can't enjoy life to the fullest. Am I right?" Her last question disturbed my link of listening to her thoughts which were her genuine reflection over her own life. I could just smile. What else I could have said to this little girl who was sharing her insights with me so honestly?  I was highly amazed and happy to see this girl who is considerably younger than me, reflecting over her life so truthfully. I could just smile and she smiled back. Don't we expect small small things from people and get easily hurt if these expectations don...

While searching some information online,I came across one article where the writer has written about how to bring about desirable change in life by breaking bad habits. I read that article and it was such an eye opener that I found it very much insightful. While reading that article I also could remember Kurt Lewin's 'Change model'. What does this 'Change model' of Kurt Lewin say? Most of the people are unhappy in their life because they don't know how to change their certain habits pertaining to thoughts, emotions and behaviour. People often say that they want to change themselves but they don't or can't (Seemingly). So according to Kurt Lewin's 'Change model', we can bring about desirable change with the implementation of three phases - Unfreez, Change and Refreez. Let me illustrate this with an analogy. If we have to change the shape of water from 'cylindrical' to 'cone', first we need to 'unfreez' ...

रॉबिन शर्मा लिखित 'आपली आत्मशक्ती ओळखा' पुस्तक वाचत होते. पुस्तक खूप प्रेरणादायी आणि डोळ्यात अंजन घालणारं आहे, नवीन ज्ञान देणारं आहे, तमाकडून तेजाकडे नेणारं आहे. त्यातील एका प्रकरणाच्या नावाने मला आकर्षित केलं. ते नाव वाचून मला काही अंदाजच बांधता येईना की या प्रकरणात नेमकं काय लिहिलेलं असेल. प्रकरणाचं नाव होत - 'रंगीत काचेची खिडकी'. हे नाव मला खूप आकर्षक वाटलं आणि मी लागलीच ते प्रकरण वाचायला सुरुवात केली. प्रकरणाची मध्यवर्ती कल्पना अशी होती की प्रत्येकाच्या आयुष्यात अशीच एक रंगीत काचेची खिडकी असते आणि आपल्यापैकी प्रत्येकजण त्या रंगीत काचेच्या खिडकीतूनच जगाकडे पाहात असतो. आपण बर्याचदा जग जसे आहे तसे पाहात नाही तर आपण जसे आहोत तसे जग आपल्याला दिसत असते. किती खर आहे हे, नाही का?  तुम्ही कधी घेतलाय अनुभव याचा? आपण सुखी असलो, आनंदी असलो की जगही आपल्याला सुखी आणि आनंदी दिसत आणि आपण जर दुखी असलो तर जगही आपल्याला दुखी दिसत. आपण आजूबाजूला जे पाहात असतो ते आपल्या आंतरिक घडामोडीचं प्रतिबिंब असत. कोणीतरी म्हटलंच आहे, "सौंदर्य हे ते पाहणाऱ्याच्या नजरेत असत." खर आहे. बर्...

I and my friend, we both got inside the train. We were travelling to home from our office. Thankfully,train was not that crowded today. We started searching for place to sit. My friend got one and I too got it within next few minutes.  I sat. There was a girl, who was sitting beside me on my left side, near the window. She was around 26-27. I guessed so. I and my friend, we were busy in chatting. The next station came and a lady entered with two kids. One of them swiftly came to the window, near us and started looking outside. Little children have this very common and genuine attraction towards windows, so we have. Well, we were still busy in chatting. After couple of seconds, the girl beside me requested me to shift little bit to my right side. I wondered,'why?' Generally people sitting at the end of the seats request the next person to shift little bit but why she was saying me to shift. I got confused. She told me,"Just move little bit so that this little kid can si...

Don't we do this most of the time? Yesterday we had fight with our parents or partner or with someone very significant and we keep on thinking about that for next few days. This happens with you right? Don't worry. You are not a single person experiencing this. There are many more like you. Rather, everyone is as same as you in this regard. Feeling happy to know this? Well, wait. Story doesn't stop here. I will try to unfold some aspects about this. Almost everyone can agree to the statement that a human mind is clingy. Intrinsically, we are very much comfortable and habituated with clinging to the things, people, events and even objects. We are too much dependent of our surroundings. We get easily attached with the things, people, events in our life and cling to them. And once we are clung, it becomes difficult for us to get detached from the things we have clung to. This is the reason why some are still sad due to some argument happened many weeks back (here people might...

Today morning I received a Hike Daily positive quote. It has been said by Martin Luther King Jr - "If you cant fly then run. If you cant run then walk. If you cant walk then crawl. But whatever you do, you have to keep moving forward". We see many people around us sometimes including us also who easily give up when the seemingly appropriate time has seemingly gone according to us. Many people say, when there was time, we didn't do that and now the time is not appropriate. But is it going to help us in anyway? Not at all. Time is always right and we make it more right or more wrong by our thoughts, emotions and actions. Every person has an ability to succeed but he/she just needs to keep moving ahead. Progress is progress. No matter how long you have come. Even if you have traveled 2 centimetres far from where you were earlier, its a progress. Many people don't acknowledge this seemingly small progress which can be a lot for someone who had been stuck at one place fo...

Vanita was being always criticised by her seniors at work. One of them was harsh and one of them was too soft in giving feedback. She never had an issue with accepting feedback but she could not handle the harsh criticism. She always used to feel bad and used to get discouraged but slowly and gradually she she tried to improve her performance and started getting positive comments. She started feeling good. But the story doesn't stop here rather it starts from here. She learned one more thing from these experiences. She gained insight that human mind is so influenced by external environment that it can easily get encouraged or discouraged by mere comments of people. If its getting encouraged, its good but what if its getting discouraged with every critical comment?  Its totally bad and unhealthy. So why to get influenced by external factors. Isn't it a valuable insight gained by Vanita? Has it ever happened with you? You might have come across people who discourage you, blame y...

आज स्त्री पुरुषाच्या खांद्याला खांदा लावून जवळजवळ सर्वच क्षेत्रात कार्यरत आहे. आज तिने यशाची बव्हंशी क्षेत्र पादाक्रांत केली आहेत. पण अशा किती स्त्रिया आहेत? अगदी हाता...